Sayonara, Airashii Kimiko
by Chaseforever
Summary: Raimundo's feelings when Kimiko dies in a terrible battle.


Okay, okay. I know that this idea has probably been written hundreds and hundreds of times, but I still want to do this. Sorry for people who think I'm copying them, I'm not. I just liked this idea so I figured I would write something on it. And besides, I need something unpredictable. For once I'm going to do something sad.

And also…OMG! Do you believe Chaseforever is finally, finally doing a one-shot? That's impossible:P

Okay, so maybe not. This is my first one-shot, so don't kill me if I do horribly.

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**Raimundo P.O.V.**

I was fighting Chase, desperately kicking and punching him for my life. I felt his irony grip clench my throat, but with my new Wudai wind power I fought back and broke him off. Chase flew in the air for about ten feet, and then he landed gracefully on the floor. His face was locked in an ugly, twisted look as he looked at me, Clay and Omi, who cornered him. We might not be as strong as Chase, but with all our powers…well, we might just have a chance, I thought.

A thought suddenly struck me. Where was Kimiko? We had always done everything together, all four of us… why wasn't Kimiko with us? Suddenly…

No time to think! Chase rammed into me, and I felt pain as I fell to the floor heavily. I could feel a bruise forming in my back, and it felt disgusting. I stood back up, shakily, to see that Chase had knocked both Omi and Clay unconscious. As for Kimiko… where was she? Then I turned around and looked back to see…

"Don't do it! Please!" Kimiko was begging Wuya, who had somehow tied Kimiko down to the floor when we were fighting with Chase. Wuya had a sharp silver sword pressed tightly in an angle to Kimiko's neck, which Wuya could easily hit her. Wuya was laughing with glee, but Kimiko's face showed something of terrible agony. She was struggling to break free, but the ropes were too strong. She was crying, from the looks of it. I couldn't really tell from the great distance.

"Too late," Wuya sneered. That was when I came to my senses and had that cold realization… "NO!" I screamed, running towards the place Wuya held Kimiko captive. It was so far…so very far…but I had to reach it. If I didn't…that was something I didn't want to think about. But even as I was sprinting with all my speed, somehow, I knew what would happen to Kimiko. I just knew…

It was too far away. I went as fast as I possible could, but the distance was a good two thousand feet away. Even if I rode the wind, it still wouldn't have been fast enough. But I kept trying. I couldn't let Kimiko die. I just couldn't. So I kept going, and just as I was only about two hundred feet away, it happened.

Wuya struck. At that second, I just froze. I didn't want to see it happening, I just couldn't let her kill Kimiko, but she was wrapped up in her own murdering pleasures and didn't even see me approaching. Kimiko gave one last desperate, pleading cry, choking with a muffled sound as the sword's sharp tip hit her vulnerable neck, and then gurgled blood outwards through her mouth. Blood spewed all over the area, onto the sword, onto Wuya, onto me. I took a look at my hands, bloody and bright red, and screamed into the darkness. Then I fled. It was a day filled with terrible nightmares, and I kept running faster and faster, trying to fend off the terrible pangs of pain that flooded through me every time the image of Kimiko, struggling and crying, came through to my head. On this day, I had seen too many things I never wanted to see.

2 Days Later-Raimundo P.O.V. 

Although two days had passed since that horrible day where Kimiko had died, the shock and horror still remained within me. I barely ate at all, and I stayed mostly in my bed. I felt guilty about doing this and making my friends take care of me, but I was too sick to do anything. I couldn't go back and talk to them. I didn't want to talk to anyone at all, especially not about the incident two days ago. I want to believe that it wasn't real, that it was just a dream created from my own fears, but inside there's a voice inside my head, a voice I have no desire to listen to, that tells me that in reality, it was real. The voice of truth.

Kimiko's death was my fault. Why couldn't I have noticed the fight raging between Wuya and Kimiko before? Beneath all the sadness that lay inside my broken heart, I think I feel a different emotion bursting inside of me, threatening to destroy me: guilt. What if I had just gone a little faster, and saved Kimiko from her terrible fate? If only I had done that, Kimiko would be alive and happy here today. But she isn't. Kimiko is dead, and it's because of me that it happened. I know that I have to tell Omi, Clay and Master Fung what happened there, but it was too vicious a reality to even think about. Why was it Kimiko that died that day? I knew that I deserved it a hundred times more. Kimiko was such a sweet and optimistic girl, but I ignored everything about her. I had always argued and grudged when she was around, and now… she was dead. For all the time I had spent with her, those years I could have gotten to really know her and appreciate her, I went after my own desire instead. It struck me that I had never cared about Kimiko until she was dead. That was a terrible burden in itself.

Omi burst through my stall. It looked as if he had been crying, because his eyes were very red and his face shined with wetness. "Raimundo," he croaked. "What has happened to the four Xiaolin warriors?"

I wanted to slap Omi at that moment. I don't even know what came over me. But when he said 'four Xiaolin warriors', something inside of me just snapped. "Omi," I said, raising my voice. "Look, I know you're sad and all, but…I…I don't want to talk about it, okay? Please just go."

"Raimundo," Omi said sadly. "Do you not think all of us feel the same way about Kimiko's death?"

"No!" I shouted angrily. "You don't understand a single _thing _about it! If you were really sad, you would…you would act like you cared. Instead you go about training as usual, like nothing happened. Don't you get it? Kimiko's DEAD!" Even to myself, my words fell limp under the crack in my voice as I said Kimiko's name. Now it was almost as if it were confirmed, because I myself had spoken it: Kimiko really was dead. Suddenly all the emotions that were buried inside of me since Kimiko's death exploded right out to Omi, and hot tears sprang from my red face. I tried to wipe them off, trying not to let them show, but they kept flowing despite my hopeless efforts to rid them from my face. After a few minutes, I stopped trying altogether and let the sadness go on its own, without me thinking about it. I was alone in a world of hurt, and all I could do was be passive and let it run until it could go no more. Nobody understood the truth except for me: the bitter, hard truth. If I had ran with just a little more energy, the results would have been entirely different.

"Raimundo," Omi said quietly. "I know that Kimiko's loss is a terrible tragedy, but-"

"BUT WHAT?" I lost my temper right then. "WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME DO, HUH? GO PRACTICE? MY LIFE AT THE TEMPLE IS OVER!"

"Don't!" Omi gasped.

"Make me stay," I grimaced angrily at Omi, readying my fists for a fight with Omi.

"Why are you going?" Omi asked.

"Because," I said, turning my head down shamefully. "I-I'm responsible for Kimiko's death."

"_What?_" Omi cried with the surprised terror I had known I would see on his face when I told him.

"It's all my fault!" I said, water drops spilling from my sore eyes. "W-Wuya killed K-Kimiko, but I could have stopped it! She had a sword…right to Kimiko's throat… and then I ran towards Kim, but then…" I broke off, sobbing pitifully into my arms. I couldn't go any further. I remembered the horrible events…

Omi looked sympathetic, his bald head nodding comfortingly. "But you never seemed to really care all that much about Kimiko," he noted.

"I know," I said. "That's why it hurts so much…I never even knew her well, and now she's dead forever. She'll never come back again. And… I kept teasing her and saying so many bad things about her. I take all of that back, every single bad thing I did to her…if only Kimiko could come back again. That's what I need, more than anything else. Why couldn't it have been me? Kimiko didn't deserve to die!"

"I know." I could see the small droplets forming in those big eyes. "But you don't either, Raimundo."

"But I could have stopped it from happening! I was so close… Omi, I think that I loved her," I said, clutching my face. "But I never admitted it, and I always seemed so far away to her, I guess. I never even got…a…a chance to admit that! Why?"

I pushed Omi back. "This isn't the way it was meant to be. Out of all people, Kimiko had to die today. She shouldn't have. WUYA!" I screamed. All of a sudden, it seemed as if I had gone into a different dimension. Instead of being miserable, I was angry now.

"Raimundo…"

"SHE KILLED KIMIKO! YOU KNOW SHE DID! W-WHY COULDN'T WE HAVE JUST TRAPPED HER WHEN WE COULD HAVE? LOOK AT WHAT THAT NO GOOD MURDERING SLIMEBALL WITCH HAS DONE!" I wasn't aware of throwing things, but I did while I was saying that. I was too angry to care about anything.

After Omi left, the entire area where Clay, Omi and I had been sleeping was in total ruins. It almost looked as if someone had barged in to steal something in a very crude and badly done manner, but it wasn't that way. I knew that I was the one who was responsible for it, and for cleaning it up as well.

I don't even know what came over me when that happened, when I yelled for about half an hour right in front of Omi. It was craziness, I guess. But another part of me was still in the raging section of my thoughts, still angry and wild and to some deeper length of consciousness, sad. The only feelings I had had ever since Kimiko died.

It had been decided by Master Fung that Kimiko would be buried the day after tomorrow, and I shivered at that thought. I couldn't bring myself to see her, the bloody and pale white corpse of the formerly beautiful girl would lay there, never to move or to speak again. I just couldn't think about it.

But if I didn't go, that would be letting Kimiko down in some strange sense. And I felt a powerful urge to see Kimiko one more time, no matter what she looked like. I would never see her again if I didn't go.

I was troubled, I knew, and for the entire night I could not fall asleep no matter how hard I tried. In the morning, I collapsed onto my bed and slept for twelve hours straight.

Kimiko's Funeral 

There was nothing official, and nobody to declare anything about Kimiko. The funeral was private, at the temple. In total, there were about ten people there, some I recognized and some I didn't. But everyone looked equally sad, equally horrified at Kimiko's death. There was me, Clay, Omi, Master Fung, Dojo, Kimiko's parents, a girl I thought to be Kimiko's friend Keiko, and a few other people I didn't know.

Kimiko was inside a black coffin, and the surrounding people all looked at it with bitter sadness. Then Master Fung opened the lid, to everyone's horror. The person inside looked nothing like the Kimiko I had always remembered, and the shapeless figure within terrified me. I began shaking uncontrollably when I looked at Kimiko's dead body. Her usually sanguine cheeks were of palest white, as was the rest of her skin. Her lips had become a dark purplish color, and her entire body looked flaky yet also stony. The beautiful and shiny black hair she once possessed was dirty, greasy and covered with something brown I suspected was blood. Dried blood covered her neck and chest, spread out all over. And when I saw it, I knew that this was something that I could never forget. Ever. Even more memorable and terrifying was the look that was carved into Kimiko's pale face, a twisted look of pain with a realistic and horrifying quality that surpassed anything I had ever seen. The corpse held a haunting glow to it, making me feel cold and abandoned.

I turned away from the scene. I couldn't stand looking at the body any longer, or else I think it would drive me insane. How could this happen to Kimiko? She looked limp and lifeless in that way, not at all like the energetic person she was. It made me cry to think that after a while, it would rot and become nothing but a skeleton. I went to get a glass of water to drink, but shivered and squeezed so hard that the glass shattered into magnificent, tiny pieces. Another thing that had died. What had I done?

I walked back to my room, feeling uncomfortable. Kimiko's funeral was even worse than I expected it to be. Outside, I could hear Kimiko's father sobbing and her mother trying to comfort him, but I knew how he felt. After what happened to Kimiko, there was no such thing as comfort. The whole world became cold and lonely, leaving you by yourself to die.

I wanted to let it out, to cry. But I couldn't cry any more, I discovered. What I felt right then was far beyond the world of tears. I don't know what I was feeling. Not apathy, that was for certain. How could I feel apathetic when something like this has happened? I was uncomfortable just standing there.

Raimundo P.O.V. – Five months later 

I was awake one night, staring at the stars, when it happened.

It had been another day and another night, just like it always was. Everything was normal. I agreed to fight only about two months ago, because I realized it helped me feel better. I could never get over Kimiko's death, but I did start feeling a little better and going out of my overall melancholy moods for a while.

The stars were bright and clear that night, and seemed to be smiling at me. I was nuts, I knew, but I couldn't sleep because I could feel something sweeping over me. Like a presence. I didn't know what did it, but I felt good as I went to sleep.

And then the phenomenon took place. How it happened I will never understand, but it rode upon me and startled me. I was in a dreamlike state, falling right into sleep.

It happened. An epiphany settled around me, its light an Elysium surrounding and blanketing everything with the pure and beautiful colors, colors that were light and floated freely like spirits. The stars stayed where they were, glowing brightly and more distinctly than ever. There was nothing in the heavenly white area I had somehow gotten into, nothing except for me and the glittering stars and the amazing surreal lights all around. It was a wonderland, wherever I had entered.

A shadow of a shadow appeared, seemingly from a great distance. Through the light, which acted in the same way as a thick fog, I could barely see the gray shape walking slowly through towards me. I should have been afraid, I knew. And I would have been, had it not been for the feeling of lightness I had as the person walked right at me. It was pure paradise, the aura the person gave off.

But the real surprise was still waiting for me.

The figure began to emerge from the dominant shadows. I could start to see things I had not seen before… it was a girl. Her brilliant, turning and long black hair waved around her head as she stepped closer and closer, coming nearer every second. I could see a slender build as well. Then the facial features began to form…

It was impossible. I froze the second I saw the deepset blue eyes, illuminated by some light that I couldn't see. The light was dancing in her lovely eyes, and her lips curved into a graceful smile when she saw me.

"Kimiko!" I shouted, not daring to believe that it was true. Was I dead, somehow? Was I in heaven, here with my beloved Kimiko?

"Rai," she said, her voice shaky. It was just the way I remembered it to be, sweet and musical. Everything about her was beautiful, and it struck me that I had never paid attention to her before.

"Kim…why…where…" I started.

"You're still where you were before," Kimiko said, seeming to guess what I was about to ask her. "But, Rai… I need to talk to you."

I was finally seeing her again, it was so unbelievable. "Are you… alive?" I asked, almost afraid to ask. I didn't want to know the answer.

"No," she said, and my hopes were crushed. My heart froze for a second as I tried to talk to her again. "But then…why are you here?"

"It's an illusion," she said, shrugging playfully. "But I know you're having trouble adjusting to…what happened."

"I could have saved you! I… instead I failed you. If only I had gotten Wuya, you would still be alive today!" I said, with some note of bitterness that Kimiko noticed.

"It isn't your fault," she said, although her voice sounded a little regretful. "You were too far away to help."

"I still could have," I said. I didn't want to see the disappointment in those blue eyes. "And… I never had the chance to tell you before, Kim, but… I don't know. Something weird was going on inside me, and I started having feelings towards you. I always just thought of you as a friend, but in the past four or so months before you died, I had the notion that I was falling in love with you. But I continued acting the way I did before, because… I didn't want to be embarrassed. I didn't want any of that to happen, and I didn't know how to admit my feelings towards you. I was a coward, and I thought that I would never have another chance to tell you."

"You never run out of chances," Kimiko said, taking my words in. Then, slowly but confidently, she nodded. "Rai, I should've told you, too. I love you. After getting to know you for a while, I knew that deep inside I was in love with you. Not just because you happen to be good-looking and strong. There's something about you that made me feel like I could do anything. Even the first day I met you, I knew that you were someone I could trust. And I was right. You and me…we're like each other."

"Why couldn't we have admitted it earlier?" I asked. I loved the flow of her words, the warm feelings it gave me to hear her say these words. Even to hear her voice again, even on a tape, I would still savor and love the feeling. There was nobody who could make me feel that way but Kimiko, and only true love could cause someone to have this feeling towards someone else. I knew that now.

"We could have done more," Kimiko agreed. "Rai, when I leave again, don't cry or be sad. I'll be okay. And when you're feeling alone, just know this: no matter where you are, no matter where you go, I will always be with you."

"I can't leave you again," I whispered fearfully. How could she? After all this, after all we had just said to each other… how was it possible for me to go about again without her? Kimiko was the single most important person in my life.

"You can," Kimiko said. "I don't want to leave, either, but be strong. Do it for my sake, in my memory. I wanted to come and visit you, with my last chance to see you, and my time is running out. Goodbye, Raimundo."

She kissed me. The blood suddenly all rushed to my head as I felt her lips against mine, and the feelings it gave me would have been enough for eternity. I wanted her to stay here, to stay with me forever. I felt her arms hugging my shoulders intimately, and I knew that this wasn't a dream. It was real, and I wanted this to be the way it was for the rest of my life.

And then she released her grasp. I clutched at her, but her form had somehow dissolved into the air. Golden sparkles filled the air, and a rosy scent swirled around in misty silence. I felt, for the first time since Kimiko's death, happy and loved. I didn't want it to leave me, but suddenly the dream-like quality of the epiphany disappeared along with Kimiko and left me back in my bed, lonely and cold once again. The one person I loved had left me with nothing but memories, events that seemed to have happened so, so long ago.

2 Years Later 

I'm done with the Xiaolin temple now, and up to the full level, the Xiaolin dragon of wind. I didn't progress as fast as the others, due to the effects of that terrible thing that happened only two years ago. In my mind, it is still big and terrifying, but I realize that I can't hide from the truth forever. The truth is the only thing that sets you free from your own fantasies and imagination, and the only way to do what you want.

I haven't seen Kimiko since that epiphany during that starry night, but I am sure that she's still with me. I sit alone sometimes, and when I feel sad there's something that always comforts me wherever I go. I'm sure that Kimiko's presence still lingers over me, somewhere far away.

I will never forget Kimiko. Everything about her was perfection, and she understood my needs even though I acted like a jerk back then. Now I've changed, and I know it. Not just physically. I've grown a lot taller and my hair's longer, but I've also become less of the 'male chauvinistic pig' type, as some might have called me. I still go surfing for the love of the sport, but I'm not show-offy to girls. I know Kimiko wouldn't have liked it. And I understand some things more deeply, and I don't make fun of things anymore. Everything has a reason, even if you don't understand it. I personally will never find the reason behind Kimiko's death, but I _have _gotten my vengeance against Wuya. I didn't murder her like she did to Kimiko, because to do what she did back then would have made me just like her, evil and twisted. And I don't want to do anything that reminds me of the bloodshed that had befallen Kimiko. I actually managed, after long years of hard work, to create my own Shen Gong Wu, specifically meant to trap Wuya inside. Maybe someday, the new generation of Xiaolin monks will come to stumble upon it, guarding it carefully.

I live by myself now, in an old hut back in the sandy beach shores of Rio. It's a beautiful place, and I really like it there. I miss the Xiaolin temple a lot, but Clay and Omi keep in contact with me. Master Fung is still doing fine, and Dojo hasn't even showed a single sign of becoming an old dragon.

Maybe Kimiko did die, and maybe she did leave me, but there is one thing that I'm absolutely sure of: somewhere, in that strange land where I experienced my first real epiphany, she is watching me. And I can still picture her smiling face, shining so beautifully in the gleaming shores of Rio. I'm not going to say 'sayonara' to Kimiko just yet. Every ending starts a new beginning, a new pathway to the future. Maybe someday, when I die, I will see her again. I'll be looking forward to that, but I won't do away my life yet.

I know that my life is precious, as are the lives of so many other people. Kimiko's death caused me so much terrible pain, and I am sure that if I die, there will also be many who will come to grieve mine.

Two years ago, I had wanted just to go back to knowing nothing, to have never had met Kimiko Tohomiko. But now, I know that I would have wanted to. There's pain in losing something, but if I never had it there would also never be so many times of happiness. That was something that was valuable, and I was willing to pay the price.

Never will there be another girl who will take the place of Kimiko in my heart, and that is one thing I know for sure. There was nobody who could understand me like her, and I seriously doubt that there ever will be another like her.

I sit in my little house, lying in my bed at night. The stars looked bright, brighter than they usually were.

It was almost like that night with Kimiko. She had explained that she could never come back again, but maybe this was a way of communicating. I smiled.

Kimiko, if you're there, just remember that I'm always with you.

I think I could have died writing this. 8 pages on Microsoft word! I hope my efforts were worth it. Please review, everyone who read this. Thanks for your time. Also, just in case you didn't know, here are the Japanese words' meanings:

Sayonara: farewell

Airashii: lovely


End file.
